Have you spoken with a Housing Counselor yet? A counselor is the best resource available today when it comes to foreclosure avoidance advice and direction. You can get a list of HUD trusted counseling agencies online. Click on your state, then find the one closest to your home. Then, call them up.
I have a background in financial retirement issues and helping people to analyze their financial potential. What I find distress is that many people get themselves into horrendous financial situations, because they do not understand certain basic financial concepts. As a result they make decisions that destroy their financial potential rather than maximizing it with tragic consequences.
The point that I am making is that we are invited into many transactions when the foundational financial premises are not properly taken care of. Houses are sold as if they were a product, rather than as if they were the greatest financial investment of your life. So a few sums are done to see if you meet the a few basic technical qualifications, while ignoring the greater financial impact on your retirement, long-term wealth, college funds, and so on. The result is seen in a flood of foreclosures, which comes as no surprise to me.
By contrast, a proper financial analysis and evaluation of the greater financial impact on your life, should be done - before - buying a house. This may make a huge difference to your financial future - if done properly. How big a difference could this make?
Well, for one thing, it may help to steer you away from foreclosure. It could help you to build equity at an accelerated rate. It could put ten's, if not hundred's of thousands of extra dollars into your pocket.
My frustration is that by the time I get to people like you, the situation may be too far gone to be able to help. I would like to work with reactors to help clients avoid such situations up front, because the need is huge.
Is your situation beyond help? I can't comment on that without a proper analysis - the results will make the answer clear.